**SPECIAL TO THE ATLANTIC TIDES**

“Don’t Touch That Dial” so the saying goes!!!!!!

I would love to personally meet the person who invented this wife tormenter called the “The Remote Control”. The inventor had to be a male and that this little black object was invented just to annoy and aggravate us women.

I have witnessed my husband practically having a panic attack when he can’t find the darn thing. There are even times when he is so obsessed with it that he places it in his shirt or pants pocket so to know that it is within reach of his fingertips at all times. One time I can remember he thought he had misplaced it but discovered he had only tucked it neatly under his leg. Well, when I revealed it to him, he actually wiped his brow and released a sigh of relief. This reaction has shown me that this is a sure sign of having a serious obsession problem!

Sometimes I find this behaviour a little funny though. Like the times when he did not think anyone was watching him. Now Fellow Kin, picture this….. There he lies, flicking through the stations,  ound asleep. Even the darn thumb works when he is fast asleep in never never land.

I think of the times when he is napping and I say “great, this is my chance to watch a TV program”. I quietly and quickly try to remove the remote from his limp fingers but no such luck…..open pops the eyes and once again we are back to square one with him doing his daily thumb exercises. Hubby will never have to worry about his right thumb stiffening up, that is for sure.

I always ask myself and hubby at times….”Why do you always have to keep flicking through the stations? Why not just go to the TV Guide Station and view the listings?” His reply is…. “If I did that, I would then miss the programs on the stations I view at the time of flicking”. In a strange obsessed way, I guess this is a logical answer. I shouldn’t complain though because I do get to see one minute of all the stations that we do have every 15 minutes, which adds up to watching a few minutes of an hour show. What more can a wife ask for?

As to my brief TV watching, this quickly changes as our seasons change. Watch out when the hockey season begins because that is when our TV display mode is changed. The stations then are hockey, hockey and what’s the station we are watching now? ….you got it….it’s hockey! One night when the hockey season started, I actually sat in amazement as hubby flicked the many stations watching ALL the hockey games at the same time, along with his computer getting updates on the games that were BLOCKED. “GIVE ME A BREAK”. By the time the evening was over, I was dizzy watching him play with “HIS” computer and TV remote.

A few years ago we were asked by friends of ours to spend the weekend at their cabin. I thought “a weekend get-a-way, no TV and the opportunity to spend quality time with our friends and with hubby. Things quickly changed though, just as soon as my darling husband found that oblong remote object and realized our friends had a “Satellite Dish”. Well needless to say, my better half was in seventh heaven watching four stations of bowling and twelve stations of hockey and all in the same time span. By the time we left to go home on Sunday, I had to try and put his eyes back into his sockets and massage his right hand before he could begin our drive home.

Fellow Kin, it’s no lie when I say that the last thing I hear and see before I turn in for the night and when I awake in the morning is “sports”. Hark! What’s that I hear? Yep! It’s the TV once again with hubby watching Sports Desk getting the highlights of all the games that he had watched the night before.

And then I chuckle to myself…………………

“Here starts, yet, another day of Hubby’s Remote Control Syndrome”

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Rosie Cairns has been a member of the CBS Kin Family for 35 years.  She has held all club positions numerous times with the

exception of Treasurer. She was presented with her Elspeth Rogers Life Membership in 1991 and has won many awards such as:

Zone, District and National Bulletin Award Winner, Zone Scrapbook Winner (4) times, Zone Quill Winner (4) times, District Quill

Award Winner, Maple Leaf, Gem Award and Diamond Award Winner.  LM Rosie also served as Zone Kinette Coordinator in

1994-95.